Memoirs of My Wedding Day: A Year Later

To begin this blog post, I wanted to give a disclaimer that this is a VERY LONG post.  I wrote it over the course of a few weeks--mainly when I didn't want to study for finals.  This is in honor of mine and Judd's first wedding anniversary.  These are my memories of my wedding day.  I hope that you enjoy them!

I woke up in the blue bedroom with Chelsea and Becca in the bed with me.  I had woken up this way with them hundreds of times before.  It was totally normal for us to sleep three in a bed.  Mom always compared us to puppies that like to cuddle up when they sleep.  What wasn’t normal was that I woke up long before them.  I remember telling myself that I couldn’t think too hard about the day.  I was very excited and looking to the future with anticipation, but today was one of those days that I simple had to wake up and go through the motions.  I could think long and hard about it later. 

                I jumped in the shower and started drying my hair once I was out.  Brittany was doing my hair that day, but I was supposed to at least get it dry.  I greeted my parents when I went upstairs and when Brittany came over we went back downstairs to get me ready.  She did my hair, just how I wanted it, and began to apply my make-up.  By this point, Chelsea and Becca were awake and were helping Brittany along with getting themselves ready. 

                Although I had woken up with plenty of time to get ready, I soon realized that I was running a bit behind schedule and realized I had to hurry and get dressed.  I decided to wear a white dress with flowers on it that my mom had bought me years ago from the Wight House.  I don’t know why I picked it.  It made me look young and was reflecting how I was feeling.  I grabbed my two bags and jumped in the car with my mom and dad.  No one else was driving with us.  They would arrive later. 

                Mom was upset because we were running late.  I don’t know why should would expect anything else.  We were always running late.  The running joke in our family was to tell a Knight girl that the event was happening 30 minutes before it actually started if you wanted her to arrive on time.  She was speeding now.  I could see the state capitol building and as we turned the corner I saw Temple Square.  We drove down past the Avenues and started looking for a place to park.  That was when I saw Judd.

                He must have been running late too.  He was wearing his suit and carrying a bag.  His dad was with him.  We made eye contact and waved as he crossed the street.  It was raining and cold and I don’t blame them for running in their nice clothes.

                Mom decided to drop me and Dad off and she would find a place to park.  We jumped out of the car on the corner of the Conference Center and crossed the street just like Judd already had.  It was colder than I had expected and the overcast sky was mysterious and full of wonder—another reflection on my mood.  We crossed through the gates into a building I had never been in. 

                I saw Judd there.  Waiting for me.  It was crowded in the small lobby.  A lot of people were there that day.  He walked over with a smile and greeted me with a hug.  I couldn’t think about it.  He could tell I was nervous.  I could tell he was too.  His dad gave me a hug and told me how excited he was.  We were still running late so an usher started to show us down the hall.  I couldn’t go yet.  I had to wait for my mom.  I told my dad and him to go ahead without me while I waited for mom.  They left.

                That was when it all started to hit me.  I was scared.  I didn’t know where Mom was, I was all alone, and I knew that this was the biggest day of my life.  I couldn’t help but think about what I was doing.  I was thinking about all of the events that had happened in my life to get me ready for this point.  You know that saying that goes, “Someday, someone will walk into your life and make you realize why it never worked out with anyone else.”  That is how I had always felt with Judd.  I had the opportunity to date a lot of great guys while I was still single, but I had never realized how lonely I was until I met Judd.  He made me feel complete and that I could reach my full potential with him by my side.  I knew he felt the same way about me. 

                Eventually my mom came through the door.  She smiled when she saw me and apologized for being late.  We walked back into the dressing room and I changed for the sealing.  As I was getting dressed I remember feeling so nervous.  I had been messing with my hair too much and already the style was falling out.  Mom was so great at calming me down and making sure that everything was going to be okay.  She left to join the rest of the bridal party and I was left waiting to meet up with Judd.

                I was led to the celestial room and saw Judd for the first time since that morning.  I had to admit that I suddenly didn’t feel so scared anymore.  Judd was so sweet as we sat talking about how excited we were and how we were both ready for this step in our relationship.

                After our wedding party was seated, Judd and I were led to the room which we would be sealed in.  Our sealer pulled us aside before we entered and asked us to pronounce our names for him so that he would get it right.  He asked me if my name was Com-y.  I spelled it like this because the way he said it was like com as in comic with a y on the end instead of Cam as in Cameron (how my name is actually pronounced).  I corrected him and we entered sealing room 3-D. 

It was such a beautiful blessing seeing my whole family there to support me.  The only thing that would have made that moment more perfect would have been if Shelby was there.  I can’t blame her at all though because before she moved to Japan she specifically told me that if I got married before she came back then she wouldn’t be able to make it.  Plus she was pregnant at the time and traveling by herself and two little kids would have been very difficult. 

The ceremony started and the sealer called me Com-y again!  I had become so nervous again when he had started that I didn’t know how to correct him!  Luckily, my mother-in-law and a few others corrected him so that Judd didn’t have to marry Com-y Knight.  Judd also said “yes” before the sealer asked him if he wanted to marry me so he jumped the gun a little.  We were both so nervous that neither one of us could think straight!  Either way it was a beautiful ceremony and I was so excited that it was official!  We had the opportunity to be sealed as a family for all time and eternity.

After the sealing my mother and I went back to the dressing room to get into my wedding gown.   As we were walking there, I had such a beautiful and spiritual experience that testified to me that our Heavenly Father loves us and listens to our prayers.  When Judd and I were deciding what temple to get sealed in, I admitted that I wanted to get sealed in the Salt Lake City Temple because that was where my parents were married.  On our way to the dressing room, my mother told me that Judd and I had been sealed in the same room that she and my dad were sealed in—room 3-D.  I started to cry.  Not only did my Heavenly Father give me the opportunity to get sealed in the same temple as my parents, but he gave me the blessing to be sealed in the exact same room.  I testify that God listens to the desires our hearts and that he blesses us accordingly. 

I got dressed and was getting ready to see Judd once more.  We met up with him right before we left the temple.  This was one of the most fun parts of the day.  Mom walked up the stairs to greet everyone and told us to wait 10 seconds and then follow her.  Judd and I probably only waited about 5 seconds because we were so excited to see everyone.  We walked outside and everyone clapped and cheered for us.  Once again, it was such a beautiful moment to see all of our family and friends waiting for us and giving us all of the love and support in the world. 

The funny thing is that once everyone clapped and cheered, no one really knew what to do.   My nephew Matt was the only one who ran up to us and greeted us.  I gave him a hug and then someone yelled, “KISS!” so we did.  More clapping and cheering.  It was really fun.  Judd and I approached the crowd and started to say hello to everyone.  I ran over and hugged all of my friends that were waiting outside for me but couldn’t attend the sealing.  It struck me how incredibly blessed I was to have such good influences in my life.  These were friends that I wouldn’t have traded for the world!  They were my best friends and had helped shape me to the person I was that day. 

We started to take the traditional group photos outside of the temple.  It was a beautiful day but it was freezing!  The overcast sky was now clearing up, but the temperature had dropped and everyone was shivering.  We hurried them up though so we wouldn’t have to suffer in the cold for too long.  Here is the thing about the group photos.  I have a “better side” that I like to have facing front when I take pictures.  I know that is so silly but when we were taking pictures outside the wind didn’t allow me to face that way!  I tried at first but my veil kept forming around me like a cage.  I gave up and agreed to face the other way. 

A few days earlier Brit took pictures of me and Judd in our wedding clothes so that we wouldn’t have to spend so much time on our actual wedding day.  However, I still wanted some pictures of us on our actual day so we left to take those.  Every else had left to go to our luncheon at the Wight House.  It was so pretty outside.  There were pink tulips everywhere and flowers of every color.  The grass was spring green and all of the colors of the day were so vibrant.  We were worried that it might rain or snow on our wedding day so a week earlier I had bought a white umbrella that had frills around the edges.  Did I mention already how cold it was?  I was shivering the whole time.  Seriously though, it was three days until May but my nose was turning red from the cold. 

After a few more pictures we also left at go the luncheon.  I left to go ride with my mom, but she told me I couldn’t go with her.  She said that I needed to go with my husband.  Wow.  That was new.  So I left with Judd.  I realized that this was the first time I had been with Judd alone since we became husband and wife.  As we drove we talked about our anxiety for the day and how everything had turned out.  I couldn’t help but think about how blessed I was to have Judd in my life.  He was my best friend and it was so easy to be with him.

When we got to the luncheon we were greeted once again with all of our friends and family.  Kirt and Caroline were the ones who had reserved and set everything up for the luncheon and it was beautiful!   While we were eating Kirt asked some of our family and friends to say a few words. The truth is I don’t really remember what anyone said.  I remember Becca crying and Lisa telling me that I was her best friend.  Although I don’t remember what everyone said I do remember feeling very loved and blessed.  I would argue that remembering how I felt is far more important than the words that were being shared. 

Lunch ended and people were beginning to head over to the reception center at The Grand Ballroom on Main.  Judd had left to go to the bathroom and I kind of sat there watching everyone leave and let the moments of the day sink in.  On your wedding day you imagine a fairy tale and feeling like you’re on cloud nine the whole time.  But it is much more real than that.  At times you feel scared, at other times you feel anxious, sometimes you feel like you are going to throw up, but then you feel more loved than you have ever felt in your entire life.  You feel grateful and very blessed.  You understand why Heavenly Father values marriage and families.  You find sacred moments throughout the day that confirm that Jesus Christ is your Savior and that he loves you with all his heart.  I am so glad that I felt “real” moments on my wedding day.  Aside from being sealed to my best friend, I had the opportunity to have my testimony grow.

When Judd got back we drove one block (literally) to the reception center.  My hair was once again a mess so Brit had my bridesmaids fix my hair while she took some pictures of us in the “bride’s room.”  It was actually pretty fun.  In an attempt to get some “candid” shots, I kept telling people to do some fake laughs while Brit took the photos.  This usually ended up with us really laughing so that helped.  We ended up outside to take some more shots.  We decided to go across the street to the tabernacle in Bountiful to take some shots.  Eventually we got Judd’s groomsmen over and took some more shots with everyone.  The best ones were when the girls pretending to kiss Judd and the groomsmen acting like girls while the bridesmaids acted like boys.  Did I mention that Brittany ended up splitting her skirt while taking pictures of the groomsmen?  Talk about dedication for the shot!  Luckily she had a spare in the car.  Still, good for her for being a good sport and a great photographer!

The reception started and all I can remember are a lot of people.  People everywhere.  How blessed I was to have so many people come up to support Judd and me!  Also I am so lucky to have such a beautiful, loving mom who made my reception stunning.  The room already was beautiful, but my mom has a gift to take something beautiful and turn it into something amazing.  I believe that we need more people like her in the world.  She spent months visualizing the whole place and getting flower arrangements put into place, along with lights hanging from the ceiling, and hanging lanterns, and ribbon, and a place to set gifts.  She was so wonderful throughout the whole process.  And the flower arrangements she had were lovely.  Yellow roses are my favorite.  They actually inspired my wedding colors, my bouquet, and my wedding cake.  Mom knew this and made sure that there were yellow roses everywhere!  I felt like I was walking in an Italian garden completely dedicated to yellow roses and flowers.  And did I mention that she made some of the best food a reception can have?  Our guests had a full meal given to them buffet style!  A few of my favorites were the parmesan crisps, chocolate covered strawberries, crackers and spread, and frozen gelato on spoons. 

And let’s not forget the drinks.  Dad bought hundreds of old soda can bottles, cleaned them all out, filled them up with homemade lemonade, and then put authentic bottle caps on all of them.  Also he bought bottle can openers to go along with them and personally stamped “Camie and Judd” onto them.  He was wonderful and they bottles were a hit!  If you ask me, I think that he was a trend setter for future weddings. 

The line never seemed to end, but I loved everyone I met who came through.  There were even some of Judd’s guests who by the end of talking to us told Judd that if he ever hurt me they would come after him.  I guess that on your wedding day, you are filled with so much love and gratitude that everyone you meet is a new lifelong friend.  Even the fact that they made the effort to attend your reception and support you is so flattering.  Looking back a year later I still cannot believe how blessed I am to have the support of so many good people who are on this earth.

When it was time to cut the cake, I still wasn’t sure if I would shove my piece into Judd’s face or not.  When you are little and thinking about your wedding you go back and forth on whether you will behave or not when it comes to cake cutting.  We began cutting it (which is way more intimidating than you think with everyone watching you) and I knew exactly how I was going to behave.  I guess my immature self came through and I tried to shove it into Judd’s face.  However, Judd had been expecting it.  That is the thing with Judd.  He is also so quick on his feet and is always semi-suspicious of me messing with him.  He blocked most of the cake and then countered it when I wasn’t prepared.  We both ended up with minimal damage on our face that was easily cleaned up.

Next was the bouquet/garter toss.  I had already “promised” many of my friends that I would toss the bouquet to them.  However, my toss ended up being a joke.  I climbed up on a chair with Judd’s help but threw my bouquet into a strand of lights so it stopped short of getting to the girls.  One my of bridesmaids, Ali Brand, caught it and although she is on her mission in Washington right now, no one else from that group has tied the know yet so she still may be the next one.  Next was the garter toss.  I had no idea what Judd was planning to do but to say the least I was very embarrassed.   I sat down in the chair and Judd kneeled down.  Already it was awkward.  But to make it worse he then put his head up my dress and grabbed the garter with his teeth!  I was dying!  My face was bright red and hidden in my hands.  I was going to murder him on the spot!  However, he poked his head back up and it was just as red as mine.  We both ended up laughing and everyone (mainly Judd’s friends) was cheering.  His garter toss was as successful as mine had been since his had also hit the lights, but he claimed a redo.  Alex Bertin had originally caught it, but Tony Dibb did the second time. 

Next was our first dance as a couple.  Our song was Come Away with Me by Norah Jones.  I struggled picking a song for us.  Growing up, I had always wanted The Way You Look Tonight by Frank Sinatra, but Norah Jones kept coming back to me over and over again.  I decided to pick Come Away with Me since it was constantly the song I thought about.  However, I honestly don’t know if I would do that again if I went back.  I love both of those songs equally so I just like to say that they were both my wedding song.  Besides, Judd and I have danced plenty of times in our kitchen while I sang The Way You Look Tonight to make it our song as well. 

I love dancing with Judd.  I did feel a little self-conscious having everyone watching us as we danced, but I kept telling myself to enjoy the moment.  And I did.  Judd is my best friend.  I couldn’t imagine not being with him.  He has brought so much light and love into my life.  I have learned so much from him.  He is the greatest blessing in my life.  This is another reason why I am so grateful for temple marriages.

Next was the father/daughter and mother/son dance.  We danced to Unforgettable by Nat King Cole and his daughter Natalie.  In case you haven’t picked up on it yet, I love Jazz music.  I always have.  It has had the ability to take me away to another reality and get lost in the music.  In fact, our whole wedding playlist was my jazz playlist that I had on my iPod.  It was pretty easy choosing our playlist.  As much as I love dancing with Judd, I also love dancing with my father.  Unlike most men these days, my dad knows how to dance.  He took my hand and led me across the floor.  He twirled me in and out and we danced gracefully across the floor.  After the song, he gave me a kiss and told me how proud he was of me.  He then turned and shook Judd’s hand while Caroline gave me and hug and a kiss.

That was all that we had planned for the reception.  It was 8pm and time to leave.  I didn’t want to.  Looking back, I could’ve stayed longer, but it worked out just fine anyway.  Everyone left to get sparklers and floating lanterns like in Tangled.  I went to the bride’s room to grab my temple bag which had my phone and keys in it.  I remember that I felt really frantic while leaving.  Judd was ready to go but I wanted to go around and say goodbye to everyone.  I felt like I was doing a good job with that but I couldn’t find my mom anywhere.  However, everyone was lined up and was waiting us with their burning sparklers to run through.  So I decided to leave without saying goodbye to her.  However, as I was running out I heard someone shout my name and turned around to see my mom.  I ran back and grabbed her hand and said goodbye as I was running out with Judd.  It was such a tender moment to have the second with my mom.  She also told me that she loved me and was proud of me.  I did cry then, but I was excited too.  Everyone was clapping and cheering for us.  Judd’s car had been decorated and Grandma McEwan was taking lots of pictures.  We got in and I couldn’t help but feel like a princess as we drove off.   I rolled down the window and waved at everyone.  You know at the end of Cinderella how she is waving and everyone is cheering?  That was my wedding reception when we left.  And honestly, that basically sums it up.  My wedding day was great and I couldn’t have been imagined it being any better.  Thank you for all of the people who played a role in it and made it such a wonderful day for Judd and me.  We love you all!